Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Midnight Rant (11:51 but so what?)

I want to get something off my chest. I did NOT choose to be anxious. I did NOT choose to get upset over such small pathetic things. I didn't. I don't know why I'm like this, but I am. And telling me to grow up and face the real world will NOT help me get over it. It makes me feel shittier about myself and sad. I just can't deal with that now. I'm sad and tired and lonely and making fun of what I honestly can't control, calling me a baby will honestly not help at all. So here's my advice on how to treat people in general:

You don't like someone's music? 
Guess what, no one said you had to but don't put down something because you are also putting down that person. You never no, maybe that singer is the only reason that person is actually here. strange right? I know. Get over it, shut up. Be nice.

You think it's obnoxious that someone stutters?
So do they most likely. It's not like they were born and got to a certain age and said, "Hey! I think today I'll start stuttering when I talk to strangers, sounds cool." No. Fuck you and you're ignorance. (Okay, I know that was harsh but still). That is not how it works.

You think it's okay to make jokes about serious issues like self harm, rape, or suicide etc.
IT IS NOT OKAY! I cannot emphasis this enough. You do realize that self harm is serious right? Rape is serious right? Suicide is serious. DO NOT joke about these things. Do not say, "Yeah, I'm going to go home and slit my wrists open because I have homework." It's not funny. People do this. People sit in their rooms and do this. I know why. I wish I didn't, but I do. And it's not funny. And this lesson is directed to my sister. Jokes about suicide are not funny. Rape, not funny. Just shut up.

That girl looks like she lost weight? Gained? A boy?
 Don't say anything. Don't. Just don't make comments. Don't ask if they have an ED even as a joke. I get if you're worried, then yes, have a serious conversation, but don't make jokes like you're so fat. It isn't cute. Nor funny. Just last week my friend Shamsa was making fun of me because my pants are baggy. Guess what? I have lost twenty pounds because of a new medication and I feel shitty about it and I'm an insecure person so if she saw this, others might to.
Here's a little back story, a medicine to help me sleep, changes my appetite, I'm never hungry, food makes me feel gross. I don't have an ED, but I feel so sad when I hear jokes in the hallway about it.


I guarantee that there is NO need to point out another person's flaws. NO need. They see them, and I'm willing to bet they hate that about themselves already.

Here's my logic:

Smile at strangers.

Be nice to everyone you meet.

Don't automatically assume things and say them out loud.

Talk to people who look left out




Do your homework

Go to work

Get up even if you're having a bad day

Work on your attitude


And here is the most important: SPEAK THE FUCK UP. If you do not like something, say so, don't stay quiet, you were bless with a fucking gorgeous voice. It is terrifying, but you can do it, I'm working on it too.

If you don't have energy to get up, fear not, tomorrow is another brilliant day and you can bless us with your presence then, just try. Don't give up. Try. You can do this.

I don't know if God is real anymore. So I can't say this for sure "God gave you this life because you're strong enough to live it."

Maybe he didn't give it. BUT GUESS WHAT.


You can always find strength just keep moving. Life is hard, but don't give up. It's sad and wonderful. Keep going.

Love Aly

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